One Dark Night
by Milly Molly Mandy
Summary: One shot. Bond goes on a mission where he learns that data provided isn't always accurate. Very very vague hint of slash, hence the rating.


As his shadow crept across the ground in front of him, 007 glanced up at the night sky and willed for some cloud cover. His lean, black body nimbly leapt in to a ditch beside the dirt road he was progressing down, and not a moment too soon. The sound of a car engine could be heard approaching, and a minute later a blacked out vehicle swept passed his hiding place, its headlights briefly lighting up the road in front. 007 crouched, listening to the hum of the engine. There was no change in pitch and he hoped this meant his jog up the track was going unnoticed. Waiting a few more seconds to ensure the route was clear, he finally stretched and climbed out of the ditch, dusting down his clothing as he did so. "And Moneypenny thought I declined her offer of a date because I had another girl" he muttered, glancing again at the bright moon in the sky above him. He smiled to himself at the memory of Moneypenny, back in her office at Universal Exports, probably dreaming of him on an exotic island, shooting bad guys right, left and centre.

Starting up a gentle jog, he continued down the dirt track Felix had dropped him at the end of a couple of hours ago. The plans they had together laid down that evening hadn't taken into account the length of the road, and Bond was beginning to feel slightly edgy. The map Felix had produced had shown a long windy lane up to the once deserted mansion in the African countryside, but neither of them had guessed it would take a few hours to traverse. Counting the bends as he had been doing was the only way to be sure of how close he was to the house. The hedges rose up on either side of the lane, and were flanked by narrow ditches. The dry weather meant the ditch beds were cracked and dusty, but they would provide cover.

Rounding what he hoped was the last bend, Bond could see the glint of iron railings in the distance, and he gently moved in to a ditch, not slowing his pace until he was ten metres from the house.

Felix had warned 007 of the security camera to the left of the gate, and a gentle click could be heard as Bond unplugged it. 'That was ridiculously easy' he thought to himself as he tested a tree to the right of the gate for weaknesses. 'A quick climb over the railings and I will be on to the territory. You would think an evil genius would have a better security system.' He flexed his arms, before leaping upwards and pulling himself up onto the branch above. He eased himself up onto the wood and crawled across its length. The branch stopped a metre short of the railings, and Bond glanced across the gap, judging the distance. "It would be a shame to get stabbed so early on in the evening" he said, manoeuvring on to his feet and shuffling backwards.

A sudden blackness swept the landscape and Bond glanced upwards, his calculations broken off. The sky was shrouded with a large cloud, glowing eerily from behind with the light of the moon. Taking his chances, he moved as far forward on the branch as he could before leaping off, clearing the spike-tipped railings and landing neatly on the other side. To the seeing eye, nothing could have been distinguished in the darkened landscape, certainly not the movements of one clothed in black. To the listening ear however, there was a crack of a branch and a rustle of leaves as something heavy landed in their midst. Bond remained crouched; listening for any sound that suggested his position had been compromised. Unfortunately for him, his assailants moved silently. Fortunately for his assailants, their victim had just rustled some leaves nearby, and even though the landscaped had been plunged in to darkness by the cloud, it was enough for them to home in on.

Bond broke into a crouched run, eager to cover as much distance as possible while the cloud blocked out the moon. He knew that the land before him was bare grass and the mansion was a good quarter of a mile off, and that he was at highest risk at this time of being discovered. His objectives, given to him by M, had been clear. "Above all, do not get caught trying to break in to the mansion. Lord Macca will know immediately who sent you and the British cannot be seen to fail. Infiltrate his mansion, steal a sample of the chemical he has designed, destroy all his equipment and return to Britain with the sample for analysis." Bond only hoped that destroying the equipment would be enough to stop Lord Macca. He had the distinct feeling it would not. His thoughts were interrupted at this moment by a noise suspiciously like a gun catch being removed, and he slowly stopped in his tracks and listened.  
"Don't bother, agent zero zero sept. Stay exactly as you are." A voice growled out of the darkness, its voice hinting at the origins of its owner.

"French are we?" Bond asked idly. Weighing up his chances, he figured he could take on the man, who sounded as though he was in front of him. He had the advantage of darkness, as well as his training.

"You will not be the one asking the questions, Mister Bond James Bond of Le Secret Service"

A noise behind him alerted him to the presence of more than one guard, but before he could do anything the thick pain of a blow to the back of the neck began to flow through his body, and he soon descended into a blackness as dark as the landscape around him.

x x x x x

As Bond's tiny grasp on reality started to grow stronger, he was aware that something was very wrong with his senses. For one, he felt like he was lying on a silk bed, for another, he could smell a hint of lavender and, he sniffed, possibly some jasmine in there as well. He dragged his mind back to earlier that evening. He remembered the click of the safety catch, the French man, and then what? He strained in his memory for what happened next. Ahh yes, the blow to the back of the neck. He appeared to have failed on his first objective - Do not get caught trying to enter Lord Macca's mansion. He gently twitched his limbs, eager not to be discovered as conscious. Apart from his obviously failing senses, he could feel nothing untoward with his body, and there was no suggestion that he was being held captive in any way. Bond listened carefully, but hearing nothing, he opened his eyes slowly and glanced around.

Well it appeared that his senses weren't failing him, Bond was surprised to learn. He was lying in a large bed, and on a ledge near a window he could see a vase of flowers. He wasn't surprised to note the window had a grill over it, but he was surprised at the decor of the room. "Well if this is how all future captives will be held I for one am not complaining" he declared, sitting up gently and rubbing the back of his neck. A burst of robust laughter could be heard from behind a screen at one end of the room and as Bond looked up a casually dressed man entered the room.

"If all captives were as entertaining as this I would provide them all with ensuite facilities" Said the man, staring at Bond and grinning.

"I'm sorry, I don't think I have had the pleasure...?"

"No you have not Mr Bond. I am Lord Macca. And it was a pleasure to observe you jogging up my lane, switching off my camera, climbing over my railings, and finally succumbing to my boisterous guards. They have not had someone this successful for quite a while. It was good training for them."

"Ahh" said Bond. "I am glad to be of service." Bond was now aware that under the bed sheets he was quite naked, and thinking back over his past experiences, he couldn't quite remember ever being held captive like this. Not at the hands of a man anyway.

"You are wondering why you are here, Mr Bond" Lord Macca observed, standing with his hands in his pocket in front of the large four post bed. "I will enlighten you. My employees captured you. Now you are my prisoner." He smiled at Bond.

Bond looked closely at the face. There was something not quite right about it, but he couldn't put his finger on what it was. The round face was tanned, piercing green eyes were looking at him with interest, and the head topped by a mop of blonde hair. Refocusing to take in the whole body Bond noticed that like himself, this person was obviously athletic. The body looked slim, tucked into some slacks and a baggy beige shirt.

"I think that much was clear, Mr Macca" Bond replied, smiling back at the green eyes.

"It's Lord Macca if you don't mind 007, I can't abide with that blurring of social class that occurs in today's circles."

"Is that why you developed your new chemical - to destroy those who blur social circles?" Bond had heard of madder stories.

A delicate laughter filled the room. "No, Mr Bond. It is to rid the world of ALL social circles." Another peel of laughter filled the room. "That is where you come in, James." Lord Macca cleared his throat, before continuing. "You cannot have failed to notice the ease at which you entered my establishment. I meant for you to be captured. It was much easier to get you here if you came of your own free will."

Bond's mind blurred. A headache was forming from the blow to the neck, and he was getting confused by what Lord Macca was telling him. "I appear to be out of touch with the facts, I'm afraid, LORD Macca. Perhaps you could explain that a bit better?" He shuffled slightly in the bed, pulling the sheets around his middle. Lord Macca was studying him, and Bond was aware that his eyes had yet to leave Bond's face. He wondered if he had blinked since he entered the room.

"I said" repeated Lord Macca, "it was easier to get you here if you came of your own free will than if I forced you. And cheaper." He added, as an afterthought.

"And why would you want me here?"

"So I could do this." Lord Macca moved round to the side of the bed and sat down next to Bond, in one swift movement locking his lips with Bond's own.

Several things surprised Bond at once. Firstly was the way the voice of Lord Macca changed as he spoke those words. It was much lighter than it had been, though it had not been that heavy before. Secondly was the quick movement that had put Lord Macca next to him. Thirdly was the kiss that was now being planted on his lips. He pulled away quickly and looked into the face of Lord Macca.

"I'm sorry. What?" Bond knew he was a bit of a womaniser. In fact, he was proud of it. But he drew the line at men.

"Monsieur James, you must not be worried. It is all an elaborate plan. Mad I may be, but evil I am not." Bond definitely noticed the voice change this time, and there was certainly a French accent creeping in there. As he looked into the face of the man opposite him, his mind grew foggier as an idea formed in his head. Lord Macca's head moved forward again, and Bond looked closely at the lips as the man's eyes closed. He moved his hand up to the right cheek and brushed it experimentally. The man did not acknowledge it. In one fluid movement Bond pushed back Lord Macca against the mattress and pinned him down with his legs. Macca opened his eyes hurriedly and peered into Bond's. Bond reached for Macca's neck and felt for the seam he was sure was there. Macca was smiling teasingly at him and Bond concentrated on the task in hand. A few seconds later he found what his fingers were searching for. He pulled roughly at the waxy plastic and watched as the mask peeled off to leave a beautiful young woman.

"Interesting." He said, staring in confusion at the woman. "I think you have some explaining to do. Let's start at the top. Who are you?"

The woman smiled up at Bond and wriggled, trying to get her arms free. Bond threw the mask to the side and pinned her wrists above her head.

"I'm sorry, I didn't quite catch that, what did you say?"

"My name is Naomi. I am Lord Macca. As I said. It was all an elaborate plan."

"What was?"

"It. All of it. There is no chemical. No bid to take over ze world. Just me."

Bond puzzled over this. Someone had gone to a lot of effort to get this information in all the right groups so that MI6 heard about it.

"Why?"

"Can you not guess?" She giggled, glancing up and down Bond, who was again aware of the fact he was naked.

"Pretend I can't."

"Because I want you, and I could see no other way to get you."

Bond raised an eyebrow and smiled at the woman below him.

"You need only have said, madam." He released her wrists and she moved upwards to kiss him, her hands encircling his head. He winced as she stroked the bruise on the back of his neck.

"Did you have to make it so realistic?" He murmured in her ear, moving her hand away from the bruise.

"I didn't want you to think it wasn't real" She replied, settling back on the mattress.

"Oh, you are very real" Bond whispered, unbuttoning the baggy beige shirt. "Very real indeed."


End file.
